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Matters of the Heart. Has a Commercial Fuck turned into a torrid Love Affair which has turned your life upside down? Fear not. We have experts here who can help you through your roller coaster ride. Tell us your story and we'll do our best to help. |
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#16
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
I’m seriously wondering why did u ever get married...
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Up my pts and i will up yours as well(Power 5 and above pls) Target: 18000 point hit... will be part time now only in point exchange... Thank you for the points Please pm me for second or third round first before u up my points cos worried not able to return cheers |
#17
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
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sorry to tell you this but i would say the fault is yours as well Why? all those abusive things and demands she made for you, you didnt stop her. You have to draw a line somewhere, or it'll just keep coming and it will get worse in future. You're not a slave and dont owe her anything. On divorce, "lose our BTO". i would say you will lose less if you divorce now rather than wait for bto to be completed. If you divorce now, you only get to lose the bto deposit which is 5% of the purchase price. If you divorce later you'll lose 50% of your share of the full bto. Divorce always lead to losses, its a matter about how much you'll lose. About your kid. Yes everyone have someone they love and unwilling to lose that someone. Dont live just for your kid. You'll look pathetic. Even your kid will consider you pathetic when he grows up. Lead your own life after divorce, support him without being wanting him to stick with you. You'll be looked up upon when your kid grows up. Live for yourself, never for anyone else. Pain of missing someone you love is scary indeed. But you'll do fine after a couple of years. You just have to get through it. I have come across some similar cases such as yours before. Those who chose to leave their marriage, all ended up happier for such cases. Everything just turns out better for them. |
#18
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
Hi bro, I suggest that you straight up talk to her about it, communication is really key. Lose your pride and talk (or whine, whatever you call it) to her. Suggest to go for marriage counselling also.
After that, if things are still not changing, divorce. Nothings worth being abused. Never. Good luck bro |
#19
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It also sounds like you are experiencing depression with thoughts of suicide. I think you need to have a serious talk with your wife that you won't put up with abuse anymore and if she wants to give the marriage another chance you need to go for couples therapy. You've tried to make amends for your mistake already, if she can't forgive you then it's probably time to separate. I'm not saying she needs to forgive you right away, but that needs to at least be the directing she's moving towards. I think you need to start taking care of your mental health as well. You want to be a good father don't you? You can't if you kill yourself. It is a very difficult situation you're in. All the best. |
#20
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
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Private psychotherapists are all over. If that’s too expensive for you, go polyclinic and tell the doctor how you feel to get a follow up for psychological specialist or psychiatrist. Don’t let it go untreated. |
#21
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
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#22
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
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#23
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
TS, is your wife a foreigner? Malaysian?
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#24
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
nice.spank the backside
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#25
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
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I can tell you what is going to happen next. 1. Your inaction will encourage the abuse. 2. Being a pushover will mean she will destroy your life until you commit suicide. And she won't even pity you after you die. 3. If you live long enough, you might end up murdering her instead. What you need to do. 1. A woman who doesn't respect you as a human being is a lost cause. Take down video evidence of her hitting you. 2. Go to a counsellor and attempt to 'salvage' the marriage. Feiyue is a registered centre which you can try going to. Just attempt to 'save the marriage' but leave feedbacks of futility After 3 months. 3. I can assure you the abuse won't stop. Let yourself get injured by her sufficiently to get an MC of at least 3 days. Go to a government hospital A&E and see a doctor. 4. With the video evidence, counsellors update and a hospital MC, you can apply for PPO. 5. Once you get a PPO, you can apply for a divorce. Given the fact there's only 1 child, you won't lose as many money since the judge will consider your compelling circumstances and side you. You will lose your BTO and your son. Cut your losses now and treat this as an expensive lesson before you become the next teo ghim heng. |
#26
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
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She should be the one seeking and paying for professional help. Maybe, you as well. Jesus Christ. |
#27
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
1) Every day come home get scolded or shouted at, recently become more abusive and violent hitting me. Her father say I cannot hit her back, I am not the type to hit women also, so I just tolerate. Her mother only know how to cause drama between us and always say bad things about me.
Did she start these physical abuse even before you 2 got married? If so, this is a big red flag. My advice to you is, get her to a public health psychiatrist and be diagnosed. From your words, sounds like a possible schizophrenia or borderline personality disorder. Get the diagnosis on public records. Once that is done, file for divorce and try to get full custody. Do not tell a soul about your intention, even to your own family and friends. Get every prescription receipt and doctor's diagnosis and photograph them, upload to your Google drive. When the day comes, tell your lawyer to present your case that she is nuts and unable to fulfill her parental role. Supply him with all the paperworks. Keyword here is be meticulous. Seek legal advice is asap. Turn your sorrow into the source of drive to see your son and yourself through this. 2) Her father say I cannot hit her back, I am not the type to hit women also, so I just tolerate. Her mother only know how to cause drama between us and always say bad things about me. You need to limit your face to face interaction with her parents asap and as much as possible. Anything besides that, keep it to a "Yes" or "No", "Ok". I bet they're equally insane as her. The apple does not fall far from the tree. 3) After clearing my salary and living from paycheck to paycheck, now she tell me that the money she save is hers only and I cannot depend on her in the future if something happens to me. That's a big fat RED flag to me. Apply point 1 immediately. 4) Recently I started having depressive thoughts and wanted to take my life a few times, she told me I would not dare to. I am planning to buy a few plans so my son will have some money after I’m gone also. Don't be a fool. After you committed suicide, guess who will be holding and spending the money. IT'S HER FAMILY AND HER. Your son will get CRUMBS. Imagine what she will do to him after you're dead! Torture till he go crazy! Apply point 1 immediately. At this point, do not go to any public health for psychiatry or psychology. Once you get the full custody, deal with your mental health privately. No cunt is worth committing suicide for. I got my life ruined by 2 women before. 5) Quote:
Most modern women are not worth for you to commit suicide, they are not all sugar and spice. Drill this in your head. If you need a listening ear, just PM me. Stay safe. Last edited by LooksLikeJesus; 24-12-2020 at 11:47 PM. |
#28
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#29
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
Agreed, woman today too prideful and spoiled to ever admit they have flaws. The blame is always push on others
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#30
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Re: Stuck in an abusive marriage
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Sane people don't physically abuse their spouse over a long period time, emotionally abuse and blackmail them. If irreconcilable differences, end it quickly. The sunken cost fallacy is negligible. SammyBoss is right on this. |
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